The Sotah is a woman who fucked a man other then her husband, without leaving witnesses.  In the bible she is forced to drink “bitter waters” and and if she is guilty of adulatory, she dies. If she is innocent, she will conceive a child.

So imagine, for a second that non-one ever died – then this ritual was actually away to legitimize bastards.  Aka, an unspoken secret, both acknowledging adulatory, and mitigating its harmful effects.   Thus, the ancients were able to pay lipserve to monogamy, while having their cake too.

The rabbi’s emphise this point by  adding an extra detail – the woman can choose to not under this ritual – and the husband will have to divorce her. Thus the woman who was in fact innocent, and wanted out of her relationship could do so, and the woman who was in fact “guilty” and needed a baby daddy, could under go the ritual, and get herself a baby daddy.

Thus, the sotah – is not a figure of female sexual oppression, it is a figure of potential liberation -  very potential, but there nevertheless.